How Can Life Go On Without Our Son Daniel?

Our world became very disrupted June 2005 when we learned our 19 year old son had stage three colon cancer. A journey began with each new day taking twists and turns we did not know what to expect. Our family history of colon cancer is very strong, my dad passed away at the age of 55 of with colon cancer. My mom passed away at 55 with breast & liver cancer. I am a carrier of (FAP) Familial Adenomatous Polyposis, a genetic disorder and had colon cancer in 1998. I have one missing link in my DNA that has caused our family to have colon cancer. My dad was a carrier, it was passed on to me and my younger brother Lamar who passed away July 13, 2007 at the age of 39 with colon cancer, and in turn I passed it on to my son Daniel. The thought of me giving my son cancer has been a torment to me, I know that I did not intentionally give this to him. I feel like I have fallen off a cliff, and a huge bolder has landed on top of me, I cannot move to save our son. We fought so hard to keep Daniel alive, we did every treatment possible, we prayed every minute of the day, God had a reason for taking our son. I am holding onto Jesus, because if I let go I will fall in the pit of despair, more than I am now. Daniel was the greatest young man you would ever meet. He never complained about how hard his journey was. We now know Daniel was holding on for us, because he knew our lives without him would be so lost. I am sometimes angry because life is not fair, sad because I know someone else is going through what we are, hurt because I feel like the world should stop spinning just as mine has, and thankful because Daniel is now home with our The Father.
Pennie